zotr15.gif (23295 bytes) Chapter Fifteen:
Little Magic Shop
of Horrors

There is a very fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line. - Oscar Levant


        Fifteen years before the War of the Monster’s Resurrection, Zhara Metallium got bored and lonely. To remedy this problem, she made a city and a population to inhabit it, then named her city Marrigan because she liked the way it sounded. She made vampires and similar revenants, variations on ogres and trolls, and an assortment of chimeras and other modified humans. These creatures struck most people as disgusting, freakish and terrifying—but the critics weren’t monsters, and in Zhara’s opinion had no imagination. On the surface, Marrigan appeared to be just like any other city, with restaurants, hotels, shops, private homes, all very neat, clean and inviting to travelers. But where other towns existed for the traveler’s benefit, Marrigan was designed for one purpose: To lure in unsuspecting humans to feed the natives. It gave a whole new meaning to the term "tourist trap". The only hope of escape was to survive till the full moon. Before then, Zhara’s magic kept them from leaving. Below Marrigan’s streets, a tangle of catacombs sheltered vampires and other revenants from the sun. The catacombs connected to tunnels, which connected to an immense cavern that was actually a magical shortcut that enabled Zhara to get from Point A to Point Anywhere Else in a matter of an hour or two. It couldn’t beat the travel times of her father and brother, who could teleport, but it was a damn sight shorter trip than walking or riding a horse. Zhara was half-dragon but, unlike her brother Urlich, she had no wings.
        Creating Marrigan turned out to have some nifty perks. For one, it made a great resume piece when Zhara went for freelance jobs with the local upper-level Mazoku and even got her a gig with the Lord of Nightmares. Another great benefit was the magic-users Marrigan attracted, like the mage who would become her husband and father of her children, as well as the father of the Lord of Nightmare’s child and who was the host for a piece of Shabranigdo: Lei Magnus. Lei was also the ancestor of Rezo the Red Priest (another Shabranigdo carrier) and Zelgadis Greywers, via that child of L-Sama’s. Many other magical people visited Marrigan, some stayed, some just passed through (Zhara only allowed those who insulted her to become food for the locals), all left behind some valuable bit of magical something-or-another. One chap, a rather ancient, crotchety Elfin wizard, rented space in a tiny building on a tucked-away Marrigan street and opened a bookstore, chock full of hard-to-find magical tomes, talismans, potions and mysterious doo-dads. In the first century after opening his shop five years before Shabranigdo was resurrected, Melfinius Egatius, as he called himself (but was likely not his real name) had amassed a collection so enormous, Zhara added a special pan-dimensional catacomb annex to hold it. Her brother Urlich was so impressed with the collection, he gave Melfinius an endowment of one hundred thousand gold pieces straight off the bat, then an allowance of ten thousand gold pieces annually to fund his searches for new acquisitions. In gratitude, Melfinius renamed his shop in honor of his benefactors, using a cutesy spelling he thought would be a great marketing gimmick. He called the place Tudrac Magic Emporium: "If you can’t find it here, it doesn’t exist!" Tudrac very quickly became one of the world’s best kept secrets, a name whispered among hard-core magic users with the sort of reverence usually reserved for the most dangerous high level spells. In time, it took on the aura of legend, and some even began to doubt its existence.
        So it was with sparkling eyes and pounding hearts that Zelgadis’ little band of seekers hesitated before Tudrac’s tiny storefront, like worshippers confronted for the first time with their god.
        "Gee, did Prince Phil design this place, too?" Gourry asked no one in particular.
        The building hid in the shadows of its taller neighbors, but no shadows could hide the architectural spectacle that was Tudrac. It was a little brick box, painted purple and adorned with glowing magical symbols and beasts. There was no particular organization to the images, no reason for each one to be where it was. It seemed as if the artist (if one could use such a lofty term to describe the creator) had taken a bucket of the things and tossed it against the walls to see what would stick. Across the front of the building, just below the roofline, in shining gold letters was painted the shop’s name and slogan. The letters flashed on and off, by using a spell. There were no windows, though it appeared there once had been, but they’d been bricked up and painted—probably to prevent vandalism (or to allow more canvas for the cheesy symbols). The crowning glory of the edifice was a gigantic, pointy wizard’s hat plopped onto the flat roof. The hat was black and covered with the same symbols as the walls, but the ones on the hat lit up. There was a door set in the middle of the shop’s facade. It was painted black and boasted the only really beautiful work of art on the building: A pair of dragons winding about each other in the shape of a circle. The shop’s name was painted in gold in the middle of the circle. A gold dragon provided the door’s handle, which was set in the center of the door, just below the logo.
        "Prince Phil wasn’t born when this was done," Urlich told Gourry impatiently. He put his hand on the handle, and in a flash of light they were inside Tudrac without the door opening, or them taking a step.
        "Whoa…" breathed Zelgadis in admiration. "Even the doorknob is magic…"
        Lina giggled. "This place is so cool!"
        Gourry stared about in wonder, turning around and around and craning his neck as he tried to see everything at once. "It’s bigger on the inside that it is on the outside! How’s it doing that?"
        "It’s pan-dimensional," Lara sighed, just as caught up in the wonder of it all as Gourry was, "just as Lina said before. That means it lies in another dimension. That’s why we didn’t walk through a door but were transported here by magic."
        "Like Zhara’s house," Lina reminded Gourry, when he looked confused. "Remember how it looked abandoned when we peeked through the windows, but when her magic let us inside, it was obviously lived in? Zhara’s house is in another dimension."
        Gourry nodded though he wasn’t sure he completely understood. "You mean, like Xellos’ pocket?"
        Jessica touched his arm as she moved past him, deeper into the shop. "Just like that. There are some Mazoku who are able to cross dimensions and even manipulate space. Xellos is quite good at it, though in my humble opinion, Zhara is better. At least she does something useful with the talent."
        "Does Tudrac only stock things for black and shamanist magic," Amelia wondered as she followed Jessica with one hand on the kitsune’s skirt to keep from getting lost, "or are there white magic things here, too?"
        Jessica glanced down at Amelia’s hand, then at the Princess and found the poor girl was a few shades paler than usual and appeared to be trembling. She put her hand over Amelia’s and gently pried her skirt free. "Don’t worry, Amelia. You’ll never get lost here. All you have to do is call for Melfinius, and he’ll send you to your party."
        Amelia blushed and let go of Jessica’s skirt. "Oh. Sorry."
        "And, yes, you can find white magic items here, as well," Jessica added patiently. "Anything you want."
        "Except a spell to turn a chimera into a human," Zelgadis interjected bitterly. "L-Sama said the spell didn’t exist until she put it in the world last week." He picked up a small, gold face powder compact and admired it for a moment before realizing what it was and putting it down in embarrassment. "The most I can hope to find here is a piece of the spell. Knowing my luck, I’ll just find a clue that makes no sense and I’ll be looking for this damn spell for the rest of my life."
        "That’s our Zelgadis!" Lina crowed and slapped a companionable arm about the dejected chimera’s shoulders. "Mr. Optimism! Careful, Zel, if you get any happier you’ll pass out again."
        He growled at her. "Ha-ha. Very funny. Why can’t you take this seriously, Lina?"
        "Where do you get that I’m not taking this seriously?!" Lina gasped. "I think I’m more serious about it than you are! At least I’m a little optimistic about our chances for success! Zel," she sighed and hugged him with one arm, "if you believe you’re doomed to fail, then you will fail. So lighten up, ok?"
        "Absolutely correct, Miss Inverse!" Boomed a deep, echoing, male voice that rattled whatever wasn’t nailed down.
        Everyone but Ulrich and Jessica looked frantically about for the source of the voice, then their eyes were drawn to a shimmering golden light on the other side of the display table from Zelgadis. The light swirled and crackled, then shot up to the ceiling in a blaze of golden fireworks and explosions. Amelia shrieked and covered her ears, Urlich and Jessica chuckled, but the others watched the spectacle in awe. When the light faded, Melfinius stood before them, arms outstretched, bushy eyebrows waggling dramatically. In that big, booming voice, he announced:
        "Welcome! Welcome to Tudrac Magic Emporium! If you can’t find it here, it doesn’t exist! Here is where dreams become reality!"
        "Cut the schmaltz, Mel, we’re on mission," Urlich sighed.
        The Elf deflated with a very annoyed look for Urlich, but since Url was still funding his buying trips, Melfinius swallowed his pride. "I believe first-time visitors should get the full effect, Mr. Metallium! But, since you are obviously in a hurry, we’ll skip the formalities and get right down to business." He floated around the table until he hovered before Lina, then floated himself up to her eye level. "Miss Lina Inverse?"
        She gulped. "Yes…"
        He looked her up and down, scratched his beard, then said to the ceiling: "I still don’t believe this little girl is the infamous Lina Inver—OOF!" Melfinius sailed backwards in an end-over-end spin from the impact of Lina’s fist.
        "I am NOT a little girl!" She screamed at him.
        He spun himself back to her with an indignant snarl. "Well, I never! How rude!"
        "Who’s rude?!" Lina shot back. "You’re the one who insulted me!"
        Melfinius brushed off his robes and reorganized his hair and beard. "What insult? You’re a girl and you’re little. You could just as well call me a little Elf, and I wouldn’t be insulted because it would be true. I don’t understand what your problem is with the truth!"
        Lina pulled back for another punch and growled: "Just because it’s the truth doesn’t mean it’s nice to say!"
        A swing and miss! Melfinius floated out of her way with a severe frown. He held out his hand and a crystal ball appeared in his palm. "Miss Metallium! I refuse to do business with this horrible creature!"
        A very annoyed Zhara appeared in the ball and scolded the old Elf. "She’s not the one you need to deal with. Let me see Lina, Mel."
        "Why do you even—"
        "Mel…"
        "Oh fine!" He twirled his finger over the ball, and a sprinkling of gold glitter rained down upon it in a spiral. When it was done, Zhara was facing Lina, whose still had her fist ready to sock Melfinius as soon as she could get him in range again.
        "Attack spells won’t work in Tudrac," Zhara explained with a sharp look, "and if you attempt one, anyway, you’ll find yourself transported to a random location in the catacombs. Probably someplace where the residents are hungry. Understand?"
       "Why are you bitching at me?" Lina demanded. "He’s the one throwing around insults! I didn’t do anything to him!"
        "You hit him," Gourry reminded her meekly.
        "After he insulted me!"
        "Oh yeah," Gourry nodded. "That was pretty rude of him. After all, we’re paying customers, right?"
        Lina nodded importantly. "That’s right. Paying customers. Is this any way to treat paying customers, Mr. Egatius?"
       The Elf crossed his arms and turned his back on her with an indignant toss of his grizzled head. "You’re not a customer, you’re Lina Inverse. And I expected much more of the famous Lina Inverse, to be perfectly honest!"
        "Oh, you’ll get much more if you keep this up, old man!" Lina growled back.
        Urlich slapped his hand down onto her shoulder to keep her from attacking the old boy from behind. "Just ignore him, Lina. He’s too old for you to change him, and you’re too stubborn for him to change you. Let’s just put this behind us and go shopping, ok? We have a spell to find, remember?"
        "Right," Zelgadis agreed, "and we don’t have time to jerk around about it, either. You always do this to me, Lina. That’s why I wanted to do this on my own." He pushed Lina aside and walked around the pouting Melfinius until he was standing in front of him. "Mr. Egatius, I’m looking for a clue to piece of a spell—or maybe the piece, itself—that was left for me by the Lord of Nightmares. I think that one of the pieces lies here, in Marrigan. The clue we had was the Gold Dragon rune for twins, so we figured that was Urlich and Zhara, so we came here. You do claim that if it can’t be found at Tudrac, it doesn’t exist, so…"
        Melfinius looked up at him under his bushy brows and a little smile twitched his lips. "Mr. Greywers," he said with a chuckle, "I’ve been waiting for you, as a matter of fact. Please come with me." He held up the crystal ball and smiled at it. "Miss Metallium, I will contact you later. Thank you for your assistance." Zhara disappeared, and he tucked the ball into his sleeve. "The rest of you may browse to your hearts’ content." He looked over his shoulder and added with a wink for Lina: "The children’s section is on the fourth sub-floor, Miss Inverse." In a puff of golden smoke, he and Zelgadis were gone.
        "Why you…" Lina snarled. She lifted up her hands and muttered: "Darkness beyond—oh wait a sec. Did Zhara mean it about attack spells?"
        "Absolutely," Jessica told her firmly. "I wouldn’t test it, if I were you."
        Lina let her hands drop with a growl. "Ok, fine. If that’s the way he’s going to be…I just won’t buy anything!"
        "Sure you won’t," several of her companions muttered at once.


        Zelgadis and Melfinius reappeared in a small room that looked for all the world like the inside of a crystal ball. The walls, floor and ceiling were glass, beyond which lay a sea of stars. Seven scrolls floated at the very center of the room and were the only other thing in the space, outside of the Elf and the chimera, who also floated. Zelgadis immediately tried to float himself over to the scrolls but couldn’t do it.
        Melfinius chuckled. "You didn’t think it would be that easy, did you, Mr. Greywers? Everything has a price—"
        "Name it."
        The Elf gave him a queer look. "I mean, nothing comes easy, I should think a man in your position would know that by now."
        Zelgadis clenched his fists. So the old guy wanted to play games. What did he have to do? Pick the right scroll? "Let me guess: Only one of those scrolls is the right one, and if I don’t pick the right one, too bad, so sad. Right?"
        Melfinius found that amusing. "Count the scrolls."
        Zel did. "Seven. Your point—" Suddenly his eyes went wide as he realized the significance of that number. Could it be? "Seven! Is that the whole spell?!"
        Grin. "Those are seven blank scrolls. As you find each piece of the puzzle, a part of the spell will appear on a scroll. When you’ve gathered all seven pieces, return to Marrigan, and I will instruct you in their use."
        Zelgadis frowned at his companion. "The Lord of Nightmares entrusted you with the spell? Is that what you’re telling me?"
       He shrugged. "There is no safer place to keep an important spell than Tudrac in Marrigan. She created this pocket in space to contain the scrolls and told me all that you will need to know to use them once you’ve gathered all of the pieces. Now," he cleared his throat and folded his legs underneath himself, "tell me what other clues you found in the tomb, Mr. Greywers."
        "You’ll help me!" Zelgadis gasped in disbelief. Where was this guy when they were studying that damn fresco and getting their asses kicked out of Seyruun?! And why didn’t L-Sama tell Jessica about him?! "Hang on. How do I know you’re on the level? Jessica talked to L-Sama, and she didn’t mention anything about you or this shop!"
        Melfinius gave him an irritated glare. "She also didn’t tell you to go to Marrigan, did she? She only said to find the clues in the fresco. Hmph! Kids these days! Never willing to work for anything, just want everything spoon fed to them!" He threw up his arms in disgust. "And it had better be a silver spoon, hadn’t it?!"
        Zel sighed heavily. Figured L-Sama would pick someone annoying to be the keeper of his spell. "So, if I tell you the clues we found, will you tell me which are right and which aren’t?"
        He thought about it a moment, then nodded. "I am allowed to do that. Proceed."
        "Well, I guess we’ve established that a clue lies in Marrigan—"
        "No," Melfinius interrupted firmly, "there is no clue in Marrigan. Marrigan is where the scrolls are, so it was of supreme importance that you come here first."
        Zel’s stomach bottomed out at that news. If Marrigan didn’t hold a piece of the spell, that meant they were one clue short! Great. They just left Seyruun and already had to go back for another look at the fresco. Maybe they should split up, send Princess Amelia or Lina back to Seyruun (or both of them; he figured he’d get more done without those two tagging along), while the rest of them checked out the next clue on the list. He figured he was stuck with Urlich and Jessica until he could figure out a way to ditch them, too, thanks to Prince Phil. Better see if the other clues held water before planning any further, he thought. "We thought the fire indicated Firedrake, Gourry’s new sword."
        Melfinius nodded. "Correct. Very good. Next."
        Gourry was right?! That was auspicious! Wait till he told Lina. Heh. "Ok, we saw a White Knight, which we took to mean a Knight of Seifeid, possibly Luna Inverse."
        "Spot on. Next."
        Heh. Luna Inverse. An encounter with her was enough incentive to keep Lina around, just for the fun of watching her reactions. "We thought the subject matter of the fresco was a clue, too, pointing to the ancient battleground of Seifeid and Shabranigdo."
        "Chuh-ching! Next."
        "There was a rune for L-Sama on one of the pieces of Shabranigdo, but we’re not sure why that’s important," Zel sighed. "I mean, are we supposed to go find the Lord of Nightmares and get a clue from her? Or do we visit one of her temples? I don’t get it—"
        Melfinius cut him off with a wave of his hand. "Her rune does not point you to a clue. She is the originator of the spell. Next."
        "What?!" Zelgadis’s jaw dropped. They were wrong about two of the clues?!
        "I said you’re wrong about that being a clue. Please continue."
        "But—that only leaves us with five—"
        "Less if you happen to be wrong about more of them," Melfinius shot back in annoyance, "but we won’t know until you tell me, now will we?"
        "But—"
        "Get on with it!"
        Zelgadis fought the urge to hit the Elf and took a deep breath to calm himself. Melfinius was being helpful, though not as helpful as Zel would’ve liked. Specifically, he would’ve like Melfinius to special order the pieces of his spell and wrap them up in a nice package, complete with a how-to book, then pack him off to Seyruun to cast the damn thing! Hey…never hurt to ask. "Sure you can’t special order the pieces for me?"
        "Positive. Clue number five, please?"
        Zel grumbled for a few moments, then carried on. "One of the pieces looks like a snake, so Lina thought that might mean her old traveling buddy Naga the Serpent. I understand she’s in Marrigan right now."
        Melfinius nodded. "Yes, yes, quite right. Next clue."
        Pause. "Naga is a clue?"
        "I said as much! Now get on with it!"
        Impatient little son of a bitch, Zelgadis thought sourly. "But you said there wasn't a clue in Marrigan. If Naga's a clue and she's in Marrigan, then there is a clue in Marrigan!"
        Melfinius frowned for a moment, then shrugged. "Sorry. Forgot. Please continue."
       Zelgadis glared. "You forgot? How can you forget Naga the Serpent? Lina said that woman has a laugh that--"
       The Elf paled and waved his hands in Zel's face to cut him off. "Don't remind me! I was trying to block out the memory!" He shuddered. "Dreadful creature...just the sort I'd wish on that horrible Lina Inverse!"
       Zel grinned. "First Naga, then Luna. Too bad you won't be around to see what Lina does at the mere mention of her sister. Last time, she buried herself under a pyramid."
       "Hm, yes...pity I won't get to see it. Serves her right for hitting me, the little ingrate! Now, about the rest of your clues?" He raised a meaningful eyebrow to make his point.        "We were a little shaky on clue number seven. Lina thought it was either the sarcophagus or the hieroglyphics in the tomb. Jessica thought it might be Seifeid, indicating dragons. I don’t know if that would mean the Dragon Gods, the last remaining Gold and Ancient Dragons—there are only one of each—"
        "Unless you count Zhara and Urlich, who are of mixed blood, but I get your point. It’s not dragons, anyway. Or the tomb paintings, or the sarcophagus." The wizard scratched his beard and observed thoughtfully: "That knocks out three of your clues. Tch! I’d hoped for better." He sighed, then shrugged. "Ah, well. I’m sure you’re clever enough to remember other things you saw in the fresco—or to find more clues by looking at it again."
        "I’ve been expelled from Seyruun," Zelgadis told him dryly. "They won’t let me go back until I have all of the pieces of the spell."
        "Which, naturally, won’t preclude you from sneaking back into the cemetery," Melfinius coughed under his breath. He turned to find Zelgadis looking at him in surprise and shrugged. "Well, it’s what I would do. It was horribly unfair of Prince Phileonel to ban you from the very thing you need to gather all of the pieces of the spell. You must have done something terrible to anger Pacifist Phil that much." He winked and asked in a conspiratorial voice: "So, what did you do? Sneak into the Royal Treasury? Make a pass at her Royal Highness?"
        Zelgadis rubbed his temples. He really didn’t want to talk about it. "Tell you what, Mel," he offered with a cruel smirk, "I’ll give you the gossip, if you’ll give me a clue. Just one, little clue, that’s all I ask."
        Melfinius shook his head. "No can do. I have the strictest orders from the Lord of Nightmares, and disobeying her has the direst consequences. I’ll just have to do without the gossip. I can find out by other means."
        "Can you answer questions that aren’t about clues?" Zelgadis asked him tightly.
        He thought about it a little while, then nodded slowly. "It would depend upon the question."
        Zelgadis reached over to smack him on the back. "One way to find out, Mel old boy! Did you notice the blonde that was with me when I came in?"
        The Elf shook off Zelgadis’ hand and brushed off his robes where it had been. "Don’t call me ‘Mel’, and yes I noticed her. Sorez, I believe is her name. I thought she was dead."
        "Maybe…"
        "I had also heard," Melfinius added with a thoughtful tug on his beard, "from disreputable sources, that she had copied herself a few times. I heard she wanted lab assistants. I also heard she feared someone wanted to kill her."
        "I’ve heard that, too," Zelgadis agreed. "See, yesterday morning, that woman said she was Lita Sorez, copy of Lara, and that Lara had sic’d a monster on her when she refused to help with her research anymore. Then she looks at the fresco, faints, and when she wakes up, she’s Lara Sorez, who says she made copies so they’d get killed instead of her."
        "How cold," Melfinius observed with a slight shudder. "So, you want to know which Sorez is traveling with you?"
        "And if there’s a monster after her," Zelgadis added.
        Melfinius shrugged. "I’m afraid I don’t know the answer to either question. I deal in magic, not information. For that, you must go to Zhara. She has people who do that sort of thing for the right price."
        Sigh. Of course she did. She was a mercenary. Zelgadis lay back on his invisible cushion of air to have a good think. So, Melfinius didn’t know what was up with the Sorez woman, either. And now they were down three clues, too. Oh well, it wasn’t like he’d ever imagined this would be easy, or anything, but he really thought they’d score more clues than just four. Boy was Lina gonna be pissed. Heh. Good. He could use the energy. Hmmm…speaking of monster food, he should speak to Amelia about going back to Seyruun to look for more clues. She was the perfect candidate, since no one would question her. He could get Lina to go with her, just in case Xellos showed up (yeah, that’s what he’d say; she’d buy that). And if Xellos showed up looking for him, Zelgadis decided to use the visit as an opportunity to gather information. Annoying as he was, Xellos knew a lot of things and worked for someone who also knew a lot of things. He’d probably be willing to trade for information about the contents of Lara’s tomb. Of course, he could also take Melfinius’ advice and hire one of Zhara’s fact finders, but that would cost actual money. At least he knew he had something Xellos wanted and could trade. He just couldn’t do it around any of his companions, since they’d stop him. Therefore, he must ditch his companions at the earliest possible opportunity. But how? If he could send Amelia off on a mission, that would take care of his biggest headache, since nobody else could work up quite the happy-feel-good rant that she could. Sending Lina with Amelia would solve his second biggest headache but also deprive him of a mighty fine food source. Hm. Maybe Gourry should go with Amelia… Or Jessica, perhaps. Certainly not Lara. He wanted her where he could see her. Something about her was important to his quest, and Zel figured he’d be in a better position to find out what it was if he hung around with her a lot. Threatening her had gotten him nowhere, so Zel decided a different tactic was in order. He would be her new best friend, taking her side against those who would give her a hard time about her identity.
        Sounded like a plan to him.
        "So, Melfinius," Zelgadis asked after a while, "any other information you can offer me? Or would I just be wasting my breath, asking you?"
        The Elf gave him an irritated look. "I told you it depended upon your question."
        Well, he couldn’t think of any more questions off the top of his head, so Zel just shrugged. "If I think of something, can I call you by crystal ball?"
        "I think that is allowable, yes."
        Well, that was better than nothing, Zel supposed. He also supposed he’d keep that helpful little piece of information to himself as a sort of ace in the hole. Oh boy, he could annoy people by telling them things are a secret. He should even waggle his finger at them and wink when he did it, just to be a jerk. Maybe he should do it to Xellos to see if the Trickster would find it as annoying as everyone else did whenever he did it. Oh, what fun!
        Zelgadis sat up and clapped his hands together with finality. "Alrighty then! Guess I’ll go shopping!"


        Meanwhile, back in the shop, Gourry was getting into trouble. More specifically, Firedrake had found an old friend and refused to let Gourry leave the room without it. He couldn’t hear the sword speaking as a person might speak to him, using words, but Gourry was quite certain he knew exactly what his sword was trying to communicate to him. What Firedrake told him was he better buy that other sword, or leave Firedrake behind. Period. No argument would be tolerated. The problem was, Gourry didn’t have enough money to cover the asking price for that other sword. Furthermore, he was a one-sword man. He’d never even tried to use two swords, nor had any desire to do so. However, it seemed if he wanted to keep Firedrake, he’d better learn. So he called for Melfinius, which was what Jessica had told him to do if he had a question about something. Melfinius was still busy with Zelgadis, so he didn’t show up right away.
        However, someone else did.
        "Oh, hi, Naga."
        She smiled at him and pointed at her throat.
        "Zhara put a gag spell on you again?"
        She shook her head and mimed bushy hair and a long beard.
        "Melfinius did it?"
        Naga nodded emphatically.
        "That’s not a very nice thing to do to a customer," Gourry told her sympathetically, then he remembered something Lina had told him and asked: "You didn’t laugh for him, did you?"
        She tossed her head, then blushed and nodded sheepishly.
        "Well, I’m trying to get him down here to ask him about this sword," he pointed to it, and Naga came over for a closer look, "so if you stay here, I’ll ask him to take the gag off, ok?"
        Naga hugged him to show her appreciation, and Gourry almost fainted from the sensation of huge breasts pressing his chest armor against his body. He remembered Lina, though, and peeled Naga off of him. "Lina and I are an item, so you shouldn’t do that, ok?"
        Naga wiggled her eyebrows at him suggestively, then held her hands out in front of her and rocked her hips.
        Gourry turned bright red. "That’s none of your business!"
        Naga grinned and wiggled her eyebrows some more, then bent to examine Firedrake’s friend. It was the same size and design as Firedrake, only where Firedrake had gold, this blade had silver. Both bore drakes on their scabbards, but the other sword’s drake was made of lapis lazuli, where Firedrake’s was made of carnelian. Firedrake’s scabbard was white, the other sword’s was black. Naga whistled her appreciation of the craftsmanship.
        Gourry patted Firedrake on his hip. "It looks like Firedrake, only in different colors. See?"
        Naga turned to examine Firedrake, then looked at Gourry and nodded. She pointed to each sword, then made that lewd rocking motion with her hips again. Gourry started to be offended, then got the message.
        "You mean, you think they’re mates?"
        Firedrake confirmed her observation very firmly in Gourry’s brain.
        He picked up the other sword and pulled it from its sheath. "I guess I’m buying it. I’ll just have to borrow money form Lina, I guess."
        Naga laughed a soundless but hearty laugh at that.
        Gourry sighed. "I guess you’re right: There’s no way Lina will loan me money. Maybe I should talk to Zhara about it…"
        That’s when Melfinius showed up. He plucked the sword out of Gourry’s hand and declared: "That won’t be necessary, my boy! I see you carry Firedrake. I’m sure Dolgen Feitt won’t let you leave the shop without Icedrake. Just give me a moment to remove the tracking spell," he waved his hand over the sword, sprinkling magical gold dust over its length, then proudly handed the sword back to Gourry. "Use it in good health, Mr. Gabriev! That will be one hundred fifty gold pieces!"
        "But I don’t have that much—"
        "How much have you got?"
        Gourry fingered his money pouch and hesitated. He knew this trick. Whatever he told Melfinius he had was how much he’d be charged for the sword. "I think I should talk to Zhara about it first, since she let me have Firedrake. Maybe she wants me to have both."
        Melfinius didn’t seem happy with that notion. "Nonsense. Icedrake was made for another mage, entirely!"
        "By Zhara, I’ll bet," Gourry interrupted.
        The Elf tugged at his beard and looked nervously away. "Well, yes, that would be true…"
        "So Zhara can decide if I have to pay for it," Gourry told him smugly. "Just call her on your crystal ball, and I’m sure she can clear this up right away. Oh, and take the gag spell off of Naga, please. That’s a really mean thing to do to a customer."
        Melfinius sputtered in mock outrage for a few moments, started to deny having anything to do with Naga’s predicament, then gave up with a dramatic flap of his voluminous sleeves. "Oh, very well. But don’t come crying to me when she starts cackling at you!" He snapped his fingers, and Naga’s voice was restored.
        She lifted her hand to her mouth and let go with a really loud cackle, just to punish Melfinius for gagging her. The displays in the room rattled, and Gourry and Melfinius looked like they were going to be sick.
        "Young lady, if you do that again, I will expel you from this shop!" Melfinius snapped with an imperious stomp of his foot. "Is that understood?"
        Naga flipped her hair at him and nodded with a twinkle in her eyes. "That was a horrible thing to do to a customer! I might have to tell Zhara—"
        "Zhara gagged you, too!" Melfinius argued.
        Naga pouted but nodded her agreement to his terms.
        Melfinius then turned his attention to Gourry with an impatient sigh. "Fine. I will ask Zhara about Icedrake and get back to you."
        "You have a crystal ball," Gourry insisted with a distrustful glare. "I saw you put it in your robes before you went off with Zelgadis. Say, where is Zelgadis?"
        "Shopping," Melfinius replied tersely. He held out his hand, and the crystal ball materialized in his palm. "Have you any idea how valuable that sword is?"
        "I’m a very good judge of swords," Gourry told him. "I was the Swordsman of Light for most of my life, you know."
        Melfinius snorted his opinion of that. "And where is the Sword of Light now, hm?"
        Gourry folded his arms across his chest and smirked. "I returned it to its rightful owners after using it to destroy Darkstar. It came from the other world, so it didn’t belong here." He bent down to give the little Elf a dark stare and added meaningfully: "Some people are honest."
        Melfinius’ brows shot up, and it was all he could do to keep from bonking Gourry over the head with the crystal ball. "How dare you insult me in my own shop?! I am a very honest businessman!" He jabbed a finger at Icedrake and added sharply: "And if you were honest, you wouldn’t try to get out paying for that sword!"
        Gourry straightened up with a wave of his hand. "Yeah, yeah. Are you gonna call Zhara, or what?"
        Melfinius growled. Gourry growled. Naga wound up for a cackle, but a glare from the old Elf changed her mind and she decided to check out the weapons in the room instead. Melfinius summoned Zhara on the crystal, this time forgoing the flashy gold dust and just cutting directly to the chase.
        The first thing Zhara noticed when she appeared in the crystal ball was Icedrake in Gourry’s hand. She grinned. "Ah! Wonderful! I was hoping Firedrake would lead you to its mate! I made them to work together but I left it to Dolgen Feitt to decide if you were worthy of Icedrake. I see he led you to it, at least."
        "He won’t let me leave the room without it," Gourry told her with a smug look for Melfinius. "Melfinius wants me to pay for it!"
        Zhara chuckled. "Let him have it, Mel. It’s my sword, I can do with it as I please. It’s not like Url and I don’t shovel enough money into your pockets already."
        The Elf grumbled but let Gourry have the sword. "Don’t disgrace it, Mr. I Gave Away the Sword of Light!"
        "I told you—"
        "Yes, yes, you gave it back to its rightful owners," Melfinius cut him off impatiently. "So you said. You should’ve sold it to them, then you’d have enough money to buy Icedrake,"
        Zhara cleared her throat, and Melfinius changed his tune real fast.
        "That is, if you had to pay for it, of course."
        Gourry shook his head. "Why should I sell it to its rightful owners? That wouldn’t be right, Melfinius. You know, honesty’s a good thing. You should try it sometime."
        "He’s insulting me again, Zhara," Melfinius muttered to the crystal ball. "You know I’m only enduring this sort of treatment for your sake!"
        Zhara smiled. "I know, and you’re such a noble, long-suffering sod, aren’t you?"
        The Elf was less than amused. "I bring plenty of business to this city, Miss Metallium! What would happen if I left it, hm?"
        "You’d lose your ten thousand gold piece a year stipend from Urlich, your pan-dimensional showroom from me…"
        Melfinius drooped. "Oh, yes, well, you do have a point."
        "Anything else I can do for you, Mel?" Zhara asked with a smirk.
        He shook his head, then collected his dignity and wiggled his eyebrows at her. "Not at this time, Miss Metallium. Thank you for assistance once again."
        "Give him the owner’s manual, too, Mel."
        Droop.
        "You were gonna try to make me pay for it, weren’t you?!" Gourry accused in shock. "I can’t believe you’re that greedy!"
        Naga cackled very quietly. "You travel with Lina and you can’t believe someone can be that greedy? How naïve! OH-HO…er…teehee-haha-hoho…"
        Zhara found that very amusing. "Poor Naga. Let ‘er rip when you leave the shop, and I promise not to stop you. How’s that?"
        Naga’s face lit up and stars sparkled in her eyes as she nodded enthusiastically. "I don’t understand why none of you appreciates my beautiful laughter! Don’t you know that laughter is like good medicine?"
        "Yeah, but medicine usually tastes pretty bad, no matter how good it is," Gourry snorted. He looked Naga over and blushed in spite of himself. "Do you always dress like this?"
        Naga struck a pose with one hand behind her head and the other on her hip and fluttered her eyelashes at him. "Would you hide such a magnificent figure?"
        "Magnificent" wasn’t the word that immediately popped into Gourry’s mind to describe Naga’s curves. He actually couldn’t think of a suitable adjective while she was standing there in next to nothing, looking at him with a seductive expression. Man, if Lina had knockers like that…
        "Ah-ha! You see? You’re dazzled by my beauty!"
        It wasn’t her beauty that had him dazzled. "Um, I think I’ll go find Lina now. Nice seeing you again, Naga." He saluted Melfinius with Icedrake then turned to go, only to find Naga hanging on his arm. "Stop that! If Lina sees you doing that, she’s beat us both senseless!"
        Melfinius grinned mischievously. "Well, in that case, she absolutely must see you!" He waved his hand and in a dazzle of gold glitter, Gourry and Naga were gone. "Well! I did my good deed for the day! Teehee!"
        "No, wait! The owner’s manual!" Gourry’s disembodied voice cried.
        "Make sure he has that book when he leaves the shop, Mel," Zhara reminded the giggling Elf. "I mean it. I’ll know if he doesn’t have it. And don’t even dream of trying to sell it to any of his friends, or it’ll come out of your pocket!"
        Melfinius huffed. "I wouldn’t dream of trying."
        "Sure you wouldn’t…"


        In the Black Magic Library…
        "GOURRRRYYYY!"
        "It’s not what it looks like! I swear!"


Chapter 16